Meeting Ruby

Ruby was born nearly 16 months ago and I still find myself reliving my pregancy and her birth very regularly.  I don't go back and look at those pictures very often because I just sort of forget about them.  Not to mention, we have thousands of pictures or Ruby and I spend a good portion of my day chasing Ruby, so I don't have a lot of spare time to get lost in the photographic time machine.

Today I spent a good chunk of time just sitting here, sobbing like a blubbering looney as I relived all of those precious moments.  It's amazing to me that after this much time has elapsed that I can immediately feel all of those emotions and wonder when I think about how our lives changed that day.

Carrying a child for nine months (but really ten!) and giving birth is an experience for which I lack inadequate words to accurately describe to anyone.  I never want to forget the details of any of it, but I know will because some of the smaller things have already slipped through the cracks and faded away.  I rode an extremely emotional rollercoaster in which every single emotion that ever existed was touched on, at least briefly, I think. 

I am so thankful that I have all of these pictures even though I am quite sorry I look like death.  Pregnancy wasn't nice to me for about the last six weeks, and I ended up so swollen-it's a little startling to look back at these pictures and see just how puffy my face was!  However, if I was told that would happen the next time, I would do it again.  The reward at the end more than made up for everything.

I wanted a way to compile these precious pictures so that I have them always.  So once I composed myself this afternoon, I put together a little montage (and um, I cry every time I watch it still..especially at that part where she is just born and again when they first laid her on my chest and obviously was no better at composing myself in that moment either).







You can read the birth story here -it's long.